Social Media Perfectionism: Why We Should All Be Careful When Using Social Media 

The last couple of years there has been an exponential growth in the use of websites and apps that allow social interaction, such as Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, gaming sites and virtual worlds such as Sims. These sites and applications, all considered as social media, offer today’s youth a portal for entertainment and communication. I am pre social media when it comes to the advertising and promotion branch. However, when it comes to the personal use of social media I feel that there should be some boundaries. It’s pretty contradictive, but I would rather not see my children grow up in an environment filled with cyber bullying and perfectionism. 

Children Nowadays

I have grown up in the time digital media developed itself. While being outside roller-skating, jumping on the trampoline or playing with my dolls, the first iPhone was launched. Of course, I did not completely grow up in the old-fashioned time, as I still regularly played old PC games on the desktop, but I still feel I have lived in the time where they played tag and shot marbles on the playground. Comparing this to my younger brothers and sister, all born after 2000, a lot has changed. The normal age for a child to get the old iPhone from their parents has decreased to an age where in earlier years, people didn’t have a cell-phone at all, not even a flip phone. Nowadays it is completely normal for young teenagers to be active on social media before going to high school, without realizing who can see their activity and how this behavior can have an effect on their future.

Is Social Media Good For The Development of Teenagers?

Pro’s When Using Social Media
A large part of the teenagers’ social and emotional development is occurring while on the internet. A clinical report written by O’Keeffe & Clarke-Pearson (2011) discusses the impacts of children using social media, both positive and negative. One of the main benefits of social media is that it fosters one’s individual identity and social skills. The sharing of artistic and musical posts and the creation of blogs, podcasts, and video’s enhances individual and collective creativity. Besides, social media enhances learning opportunities, as students are often using social media to connect with peers to discuss homework or exchange ideas about assignments. Children also have better opportunities to access online information about health, sex and menstruation issues.

Risks of Social Media
Unfortunately, there is also a dark side on social media. The most common online risk for all teens is cyberbullying, which can cause psychosocial outcomes such as depression, anxiety and isolation. What occurs especially under teen population is sexting. Some teens who have engaged in sexting have been threatened and often the revelation of such videos/photos in public causes emotional distress with accompanying mental health conditions for victims. Other problems include privacy problems, internet addiction and sleep problems. Various resources collected statistics about social media, which demonstrate the need for parents to spend time talking with their children about the dangers of social media and monitor their teens computers, mobile phones, and tablets.

Social Media Perfectionism

Next to these well-known issues in the social media environment, there is another big problem that I would like to highlight. The last years of the social media boost, Instagram has become extremely popular. It has been created as a positive outlet to share photos and express yourself. However, because of this it has set a high standard for vulnerable younger- as well as older users. We, cause I think I speak for myself and many others, are scrolling through perfectly edited Instagram posts capturing people’s happy moments. We literally look into ‘perfect worlds’, which can often give you the feeling of Fear Of Missing Out (FOMO). This is a feeling that others might be having experiences, while asking yourself why you aren’t as happy or fulfilled as the person behind the post. This feeling can lead to social anxiety, al low self- esteem and a negative body image.

How Should We Deal With This Problem?

If you are feeling addressed by this problem, let’s do something about it! Start with tackling that desire to stay continually connected with what others are doing. Online perfectionism is not a necessity  for happiness. Behind a perfect picture there is often a lot of work and insecurity. Focus on what you have, not on what you are missing. As Michelle Obama said: success is not about how your life looks to others, it is about how it feels to you. Let’s make the social media environment the creative and informative platform as it was intended to be, without having depression, anxiety and  sleep deprivation as a result. Learn children nowadays that there is more than digital amusement. Let’s bring them back to the playground again.